MY THOUGHTS (PART 6)

As I mentioned in some of my earlier posts, my autism makes me process my emotions differently than an average person. The particular emotion that will be covered in this post is how my autism allows me to process anger. Even though I am a very stoic individual and am able to conceal my true emotions with ease, my true emotions are pretty strong on the inside. For example, when I see the evil that ISIS creates on the news, I tend to have dark fantasies about punishing ISIS in the most unspeakable way I can imagine.

Another example of how I process rage involves my long list of traumatic experiences with bullies. Even though I was calm and stoic on the outside, my rage was on the verge of boiling over. In other words, whenever I witness evil on the news or experience it firsthand, my rage becomes difficult to contain even though I conceal it well.

With this in mind, my autism tends to make some of my emotions stronger than others. Fortunately, I do not allow this rage to control me at all and I never make angry outbursts. Instead of keeping my anger bottled up inside, I utilize it to create the supervillains of my series, which is a much more healthy way of managing it. Another way I use my anger in my writing is when I depict my characters experiencing it. This has turned out to be a rather therapeutic method of dealing with my emotions as well as my autism. So even though my rage is strong, it can be very useful when it comes to my writing.

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8 thoughts on “MY THOUGHTS (PART 6)”

  1. I too feel anger very intensely on the inside, but am good at hiding it – for a time, anyway. This applies to anger at both things that affect me personally (such as bullying) and anger that is related to other things (for me, mainly things to do with the computing industry such as Microsoft’s disgusting approach to software development). But I also feel other emotions very strongly as well, such as sadness, frustration, and even happiness on the odd occasion that it comes along – the degree to which I show these emotions depends a lot on how comfortable I am in my surroundings, especially considering the people therein. Funny enough I was talking to my mother about this the other day.

  2. Great way of utilising an otherwise draining emotion. I can empathise and perhaps one day, I will explain. Until then, continue to write and use your feelings to fuel your creativity.

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